I achieved two major milestones this month. First, I turned 30 and used this as an excuse to show Hard Target to 35 of my closest friends in Brooklyn. Second, this newsletter reached 1,000 subscribers. What can I say except: it should have happened sooner. Thank you for reading. I am hoping to try some new things with the newsletter as we approach the fortieth issue, including more interview pieces, guest movie diaries, and of course, more classic longform movie theorizing. But the newest thing I’d like to try is the movie mailbag.
To be clear: I can’t help you with your problems, but I can recommend a movie or two. Is roommate movie night being torn apart because you can’t agree on a film? Are your parents still furious about what you recommended to them last Thanksgiving? Let me know what you’re looking for here, and I might publish your letter with a few recommendations.
And what of October’s movies? Did anything even come out this month? Oh yeah …
Killers of the Flower Moon (Martin Scorsese, in theaters)
Scorsese’s long-awaited return to the big screen is the devastating true story of a 1920s genocidal conspiracy to murder Osage people in Oklahoma in order to steal their lucrative oil headrights.
I have been sitting here trying to figure out ways to describe this movie with just a tiny fraction of its intelligence and grace, but I don’t have many more words than that this is a masterpiece, a landmark achievement in American filmmaking. Killers is overwhelming in its scale and its beauty, magnifying the stories that have fascinated Scorsese throughout his career—gangster plots, abusive marriages, the legacy of blood ancestry—and working them into one of his most thoughtful films.
I don’t know how people watched Certain Women (2016) and didn’t walk out thinking Lily Gladstone was one of the finest actors working in independent film, but hopefully Killers changes that. Gladstone is remarkable, bringing earned warmth and stillness to Mollie. She is tragic without ever being a simple tragedy, victimized without just being one of the many female victims of the Scorsese filmography. I don’t think this movie could be made without her as its center, and she holds it with a compelling grace. I usually dislike DiCaprio but I think this is one of his best performances, playing Ernest with measured soullessness rather than his usual ham-fisted explosiveness.
I hope we get ten more movies like Killers from Scorsese but even getting one is already a blessing. Any decent country would write him a check to make a movie like this every few years but I suppose we’ll just have to hope the next iPhone sells well and Apple gives him another quarter billion.
Dicks: The Musical (Larry Charles, in theaters, probably not for long)
Perhaps my biggest cinematic disappointment of the year so far. An attempted send-up of Broadway about two assholes that Parent Trap their estranged family, Dicks is an overlong Fringe show made with 3 AM “and what if we did this next?” ethos.
Because it’s 2023 and nothing can be just a bit of fun, Dicks has to be CHAOTIC, GLEEFULLY UNHINGED, ABSOLUTELY DEMENTED. And yet when you’re targeting an audience that spends an average of six hours a day on their phones, is “Megan Mullally has a crazy vagina” really that groundbreaking of a comedic stunt? And if so, why does it feel like a joke I would’ve seen on South Park when I was thirteen? I’ve previously enjoyed the comedy duo of Josh Sharp and Aaron Jackson, but as quickly became clear after the twentieth identical line reading, neither have the cinematic comedic range to star in a full 90 minute movie.
Most disappointing is the miserable dirge of songs. Megan Thee Stallion’s “Boys Suck” rap is brutally uninspired, and each of their show tune parodies was done several times better by Crazy Ex-Girlfriend five years ago. We are living in a post “Joan, Still” world. If the dancing and staging are going to be this first-thought, I need a single memorable lyric. After the glorious first ten minutes (much of which appears in the trailer), there’s a handful of funny lines and sight gags, but they’re too few and far between to justify the price of admission.
Priscilla (Sofia Coppola, in theaters)
Sofia Coppola’s take on the relationship between Priscilla and Elvis Presley, depicted only and exactly as Coppola would.
Coppola’s interests—the gilded cage of white girlhood, the seductive pleasures of materialism—have not changed, though our climate has. An acidic confection about stolen girlhood, Priscilla is effectively the same film as Marie Antoinette, but perhaps audiences today are in a better place to receive information that might hurt them (like that Elvis was bad). Cailee Spaeny’s delicate performance, carried mainly by the careful flicks of her eyes, is enchanting. I’m pleased by Jacob Elordi saying he mainly knew Elvis from Lila & Stitch, a true testament to his eternal performance of Aussie dumb-guy. Everything else is unsurprising.
John Carpenter’s Suburban Screams (John Carpenter, streaming on Peacock)
Oh, John. I have long tried to keep a separation in this newsletter between film and miniseries, but John Carpenter is the closest thing this newsletter has to a patron saint, so I feel duty-bound to watch—if only to tell you not to waste your time. I was surprised to see Carpenter semi-back to work given he has spent the last several years proudly hanging out. Carpenter provided voiceover, music and some “remote-directing,” i.e. moved a crew around over Zoom, and while I give him props for this unexpected advent in sitting down, I can’t help but ask why he bothered to do it at all. Why half-ass something this terrible when you can simply do nothing and take David Gordon Green’s money.
Suburban Screams is a six-part “true horror” series with interviews and shockingly poorly-acted reenactments. The allegedly true, allegedly scary stories range from mundane (a woman’s alcoholic husband dies of a heart attack) to confusing (a ghost stacks a bunch of chairs on top of a table). In between riveting stories of a man running around in a bunny costume, we get deeply insightful, carefully edited pieces of audio like, “The emotions would become very intense. Almost, uh, so emotional. So sad. Like, sadness.”
It’s a bizarre thing to watch right now, especially next to Killers which depicts an actually true story about the dangers of living with other people. But Suburban Screams seems intended for the same half-wits who share fake human trafficking stories on Nextdoor, too terrified to draw any actual conclusions about what drives us to harm each other.
The Mill (Sean King O’ Grady, streaming on Hulu)
Do you want to watch something about workplace ennui but can’t look up from your phone long enough to understand what’s going on in Severance? Maybe you love how obvious Black Mirror is but wish it were longer, or have always wanted to watch The Platform (2019) but are scared of subtitles? Turns out you are looking for The Mill, an attempt at science fiction and social commentary about a man whose workplace underperformance lands him in a concrete cell. Each day he and his coworkers are forced to push a massive stone mill while they’re taunted by an all-seeing AI that offers them workplace tips.
Lil Rel Howery is doing his best but every breath of this movie is just flat-out cowardly, from its derivative story to its boring cinematography. Frankly, you can just watch Holes (2003) and have a far better time.
Taylor Swift: The Eras Tour (Sam Wrench, in theaters)
I didn’t see it, lol. But if you did, or your friend did, and you guys have stuff you want to write about, can I interest you in submitting to my zine?
People tend to roll their eyes when I tell them that Killers Of The Flower Moon was the best film I've seen all year but I stand by it. It's such a profound testament to what it means to be a filmmaker; what it means to be a storyteller. The duration scares people off but honestly its a rollercoaster of a ride and you dont even notice it flying by. Im so glad to see people appreciating it for the masterpiece that is.
Saw Killers of the Flower Moon today and was enthralled, entranced, would’ve sat thru the entire thing all over again immediately if i didn’t have to go pick up kids from school. Masterpiece, every frame!!!! Seeing Eras tomorrow, expect a pitch from me 🥲