There is nothing so cold as the icy blast of panic that seizes my bones when I realize the obnoxious couple fighting in the lobby are going to sit next to me at the theater. There are so many ways a day at the movies can go wrong, but only a few ways for it to go right.
As I’ve discussed many times in this newsletter, movie theaters have always been reactive to cultural shifts and are in a particularly transformative time right now. In our new era of film-watching, I think we need a new code of theater etiquette. To that end, I’m asking for your feedback in order to create a new set of rules for movie-going. Tell me about the worst and best audiences you’ve sat in, and confess your own bad behavior at the theater. I will share my antics if you share yours.
I come into this process open to changing my biases, as unsurprisingly I’m very opinionated about how much noise is too much noise. I’m not a hall monitor. I believe you can and should make noise at a movie theater, but much like at a Quaker worship service, only when the Spirit moves you. Under this rule, laughing, gasping, mild shouting, and crying is all acceptable—even if it’s loud, even if it’s potentially annoying. That is the price of an emotionally engaged audience.
I’m traveling a little this month and when I’m back I’ll collect your responses into one only slightly persnickety codex. In the meantime, you can read my essay for Bright Wall, Dark Room about one of my favorite movies, The Lure (streaming on HBO Max), a Polish adaptation of The Little Mermaid. I remain fascinated by every iteration of the little mermaid myth, and am unfortunately unable to take my eyes away from everything about the forthcoming live-action adaptation. See you in the theaters!
Most of my good experiences in movie theaters involved engaged audiences. I watched La Bamba and The Commitments with audiences who sang along, I watched french and italian movies from the 1960s with silent people smoking (old times), and I watched horror movies where people jumped together from the chair. I believe the audience is a great part of the experience. How to create rules for all these different moments and movies? I don't know but I believe they start with love for the movies and respect for the people around you. Feel the vibe and go along. This way we all can be happy Movie Goers.
I absolutely love an audience that talks back to the screen. I recently discovered my 8 year old has this in his DNA when we took him to see The Super Mario Brothers movie. He was loud enough for the whole theater to take in his commentary and his interaction with the characters on screen delighted me to no end.
Seeing Harry Potter movies on midnight openings with much of the audience cosplaying remains one of my all time favorite theater experiences.
Another time an older woman sitting alone next to me was so moved by a scene that she grabbed my hand. She apologized after the film but it meant the world to me that she had been so moved.
Seeing Django as half of the only white couple in a theater transformed what audience participation meant for me and how seeing a movie with different audiences transforms what you receive from a film.
I saw Crouching Tiger in a theater with what I could only describe as a daycare field trip. So many kids far too young to read subtitles never in their seats. Some too young to stay awake for more than two hours. But they did not distract me from experiencing that story. And occasionally it was even fun to watch them reenact the martial arts on screen.
The only time I can recall being upset by a loud audience would probably be on a screening of Superbad sitting next to a group of teenagers who snuck in plenty of alcohol to replicate the drunkest moments of the film and then proceed to compete for laughs with the action on screen.
Intentional disruption or distraction is the line for me (or maybe just obnoxious teens). That and don’t kick my chair. If you are engaged with the movie and not creating physical discomfort for me I will give a lot of latitude.